The Weakest Link Wore Orange

People like their idols to have flaws. They don't need to have double lives or fall so far from their perch upon the pedestal that we have created for them that they shatter upon impact; but they do need to have some form of weakness. Odysseus had his pride; Achilles, his heel; Superman, his kryptonite; President George W. Bush, non-monosyllabic words and forward thinking. Every hero needs to have some weakness, otherwise who cares? Superman isn't interesting until he has to overcome some adversity or another. A dramatic work won't compel an audience until there is conflict introduced--it's the darkest moments that really draw a crowd (another reason why Empire Strikes Back kicks as much nerd ass as it clearly does). However, usually these moments of despair are offset by a scene of triumph or an overflowing sense of victory. The weakness is quelled by the character's overpowering strengths. But what happens when that character doesn't have any apparent strengths? Especially when he's in such iconic company as Superman, Batman, and Wonder Woman?
Of course I'm talking about Aquaman. For the uninitiated, Aquaman is a character in DC comics; he's the Lord of Atlantis. Traditionally adorned in a bright orange shirt (that appears to be made out of scales? The fuck?) and green pants that offset his Aryan good looks of blonde hair and blue eyes, the Atlantean king was unfortunately saddled with rather lame powers. He is an excellent swimmer, and has above average strength, and his real selling point is that he can communicate, in his mind, with all marine life. (I was going to type fish, but since I've seen many depictions of him riding on whales I have to assume his abilities expand into the realm of aquatic mammals and beyond.) His Achilles Heel was that he could only be out of the water for one hour at a time before he became incredibly weak and would collapse. Aquaman is one of the founding members of the Justice League of America, sort of the All-Star Team of Superheroes in DC comics. But, and unfortunately for Aquaman, when you're surrounded by a man dubbed "the greatest detective in the world" (Batman), the fastest man in the world (The Flash), an Amazonian princess (Wonder Woman), and a guy so powerful he can turn back time itself (Superman), telepathically telling a carp not to go near those nets doesn't seem all that impressive.
Aquaman is often the butt of jokes; especially amongst nerdy Gen-X pontificators, The State, the people that run Adult Swim, and other witty hipster doofuses that like to postmodernly dissect pop culture and enjoy ruminating on Aquaman's ineffectualness on Challenge of the Superfriends (yes, I include myself in this bland but hilarious and comforting and sexually alluring bunch).
It's true: Aquaman didn't fit in. His flaw wasn't just his weakness, but his powers as well; it was the lack of any definition of the "super" in his job description as "superhero". He was an orange shirt clad joke, that looked pretty lame next to the combined powers of his teammates. But here's where DC could've turned Aquaman's minuses into plusses. Instead of having him try and compete in a place that is well out of his (no pun intended) league, make his battles the internal ones, not the ones against Darkseid or whatever rogues gallery that is thrown at the team. Aquaman had the chance to be the everyman; instead of being some regal figure from a decadent monarchy, make him sympathetic to the reader. Let him in on the joke of his powers, and show that he feels inferior but he also feels the need to prove himself. See? That makes him dangerous. The orange shirt is ridiculous, but whatever, that makes people dismiss him easily.
Instead of being the Potzie of the group, Aquaman could've been the Joe Pesci in Casino: people look at him and laugh, think this guy's a fucking joke, and then Aquaman/Pesci comes up and stabs the supervillain in the throat with a pencil while screaming "Did you call my friend a fag!?!" Now THAT'S an aquatic superhero that would truly inspire kids to dream and keep reaching for the stars.
If a team is only as strong as its weakest link, then the DC writers should've bulked up Aquaman. Not in the powers department, but in his characterization. Imagine the burnout in an orange shirt that constantly hates on Superman out of jealousy; or picture following the exploits of an underwater prince that has something to prove; the loose cannon that takes a lot of chances and doesn't ever apologize if it gets too hot in the kitchen. All of this and he could have a gang of shifty lookin dolphins follow him around. It's time the lesser appreciated people, the Larrys of the world's Three Stooges act, find a way to accentuate and define themselves better. Rise up and cast off your shackles of mediocrity and unintentional hilarity! You have nothing to lose but the few fanboys that pathetically idolize you!