Take it, Fanboys! Take it right up the arse!*
Do you hear that, fellow geeks, deranged nerds, and twisted dorks everywhere? That's the sound of your childhood being pissed on. That's a picture of Brandon Routh as Superman in the upcoming, and newest, movie version of the icon as directed by Bryan Singer.
Seriously, the "S" is tiny. Is Superman trying to be subtle? Cuz when I think man in blue tights flying around a city and throwing cars, I think "tone it down".
I know a bunch of my nerdy compadres will offer up X-Men movies' costume changes. But that's different. They took a completely different and realistic approach.
But this...this looks like something one of my friends would have made before attending a Comic Book Convention. Drawing a tiny S on your chest, wearing a matching belt, and dyeing your underoos does not a hero make.
It's all uphill from here, Bryan Singer. Don't Schumacher this.
Oh -- and Matthew Vaughn, the director of X-Men 3, has said in this interview that the tone will be like Unforgiven, and Vinnie Jones is being cast as Juggernaut. So it sounds like next year is gonna be banner fuckin year for disappointment.
(the pic is from www.moviepoopshoot.com, but it's been printed everywhere)
*Not intended as a gay joke. But if it's funny to you that way, I say go for it.
posted by The Neurotic Monkey @ 1:43 AM
6 Comments:
picky picky picky
a. Didn't you say once, either to me directly or in this blog, that you do not use the term "arse," unless you are drunk. If so, how dare you hit the sauce without me!
ii. I will discredit myself by stating that I am not as nerdy as you, or probably most of your loyal readers. BUT fashion is one something I know a thing or two about. That said, I think the costume is fine! The proportion of the S makes superman's chest and shoulders seem larger, and makes him look taller. And I dig the belt. Its low slung, which adds to the S's effect in lengthening the torso.
3). What's so bad about Vinne Jones? He was decent as Bullet Tooth Tony, no? I have confidence that he will be a fine villian. The more important question on everyone's minds is: will Gambit finally get the attention he deserves?
You nerds have such high expectations for these adaptations, you choose only to be disappointed. Chin up and stop hatin!
First off all...don't be stealing my numbering system. It's patented.
a) Superman is being shot in Australia and X3 is directed by a Brit and he's lookin to cast a Brit soccer player as the Behemoth Juggernaut. Hence the usage of "arse", as it represents the geographical origin of the sodomy.
ii) Why should he care what his chest looks like? He's muthafuckin Superman! The emblem should be bold and big as fuck all! He shouldn't be looking to compliment his physique. And it doesn't make the rest of his body look any bigger or taller -- despite what fashion theory might say -- it just makes all of his accoutrements look tiny and ridiculous.
3) Vinnie Jones is a good actor. However, being a fine villain is a completely different thing than playing a character that is supposed to be about 7 feet tall and about as wide as your average SUV. As for Gambit -- I never cared for the guy. He always seemed like a cajun fried ripoff of Wolverine that they invented to get the next round of angsty teens. Loner with a shadowy past and questionable ethics who can cause a lot of damage. Everyone wants to be Clint Eastwood, no one ever wants to be Cyclops.
As for nerds, yes we do have high expectations for adaptations. For many of us, these comic books represent our childhood, characters we know and love, and may have influenced our current lives to some degree.
Think about your favorite book of all time. Go on. Now imagine if people cut out everything that wasn't marketable, replaced it all with pretty people in leather, and then totally miscast most of your characters. You'd be pissed, yes?
I'm still of the camp that I'll decide how badly everything sucks once i see it -- HOWEVER, I'm still allowed to have preliminary misgivings when Superman is bouncing around like a ponce and a british nancy boy is trying to revise a cultural institution. I'll still see both movies, and maybe even like them. But they have uphill battles to wage.
People that take on the responsibility of directing comic book movies and/or remakes have to realize that it's not just another franchise or some product tie-in with Burger King. Most of them realize how much people care about these characters and this world, they understand that Nerds will be putting everything under the microscope. The reaction of some is to just not care, the reaction of others is to care only enough to still be hailed as a god at Comicons, but there's few that care enough to respect these feelings and make them into a good movie (The Crow, Sin City, X2). In those cases, they usually work closely with original writers of the comics and try to adhere to both the comics themselves and the spirit of the comics.
If it's entertaining and not a complete slap in the face then I let it slide. For example, LOTR: Two Towers -- one of the worst adaptations ever. It truly is. At least in terms of adapting Characters, Situations, and scenes it's a train wreck. HOWEVER, it's a great movie. It captures the essence of the second book of the Ring trilogy. It's exciting and cool and the battle of Helm's Deep is an amazing and epic scene that depicts much more than Tolkein had ever (probably) conceived. So my lil nerd mind was troubled and torn -- do i go with the lack of faithfulness and hate this movie, or go with my moviewatching heart that loved this movie? As it stands i love Two Towers, but just with a lil asterisk attached to it.
you did not invent that numbering system, Paul Riser used in an episode of "Mad About You"
we have had this discussion before
Gambit4eva!
everybody just CALM down.
The costume is dorky. It looked dorky in the comic books. It looked dorky on Chris Reeves. It looks dorky on this guy (whoever the fuck he is - don't know, don't care.) Tights? Come on. Eh.
The costume looks like the equivelant of those breast cancer tshirts from a while back designed by Ralph Lauren. Way to break out your compass and spend a whole two minutes designing it, Ralph. Couldn't matter less how big the S is or how low the belt - it's just GAY, and not in the cool way.
No self-respecting superhero would actually wear his inital on his chest, much less go around in primary colors. It's just not done. I mean, I just saw a real superhero (see my post from 3 days ago) the other day and he told me he thought the whole initial on the chest thing is so late 90s.
And, clearly, Superman needs to lighten up on the product, as well.
The word arse is a fine word; up there with shat and gratuitous, and in fact, if you'll check www.arsehole.org you'll notice that there is a well-funded movement to encourage its usage in every day American English. So I say go for it, Manic!
But back to the movie; it looks like a rental to me.
I love the word "underoos". Kudos for nice usage of vocabulary. It made me laugh.
As for the Superman gamut... Well, I'm a girl, I've never had that comic book fetish other than a brief stint enjoying Archie. Then again, that was between the ages of 7-12. I'm sorry your childhood iconography is being shattered by some fruit-cake in badly designed rubber tights, and a undersized S logo. (Size queen!) Well... That's just bad design on the whole. On the bright side, some people love rubber, and pay to see people wearing it, so he's in with the fetish crowd.
I'm all about the usage of arse. I think I'm rubbing you D. Err... Rubbing OFF on you.
*winks*
Dean,
I don't know why you added that footnote. The whole post is laden with gay innuendoes how can you choose just one?
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