Fuck Raindrops on Roses!

Well, I've got a cold.

I swear, since movin to NYC last July, I've been healthy for maybe a grand total of 3.5 weeks. Now sure, some people could say it's because I don't sleep, exercise, and/or eat properly, and because I smoke, drink, live in filth, and have a stressed out & overall negative mentality. That's what some people might say.

My theory?

Gypsies. Evil, ornery, spiteful gypsies.

So this weekend I've been in and out of a Sudafed coma all weekend (complete with Sudafed dreams - including one where I'm smashing all the windows in a building because Dinner has to be on time...I don't get it either). And when I'm not passed out, I find myself wallowing in the misery that is a stuffy nose and a high phlegm content (and yes, ladies, I AM single. Wink.). But then I jumped up and decided to spread the word about The Whitest Kids You Know's "Dr. Jones" video. I think it's absolutely hilarious, and enjoy it so much. This elation pushed me into spreading the word - so I sent it to the comedians Bex Schwartz, Christian Finnegan, Harry @ Ain't It Cool News, and Chris Ryall @ www.moviepoopshoot.com. It's that odd dichotomy of being a nerdster (nerd/hipster): you want to spread the word about something you like, but you also want to keep it private and to yourself, less the masses spoil it. But, more often than not, I side with getting the word out, and did so for The Whitest Kids again. And so in order to escape the melancholia that being sick brings about, I'm gonna surround myself (mentally at least) with some of my favorite things. It's a recap for a lot of people who know me, but for anyone else - this is what I'm into these days. Maybe you'll find something you like, or see something/someone you hate. As always, the only way anyone will know is if you leave a comment. Here we go:

• Salt & Vinegar Potato Chips - Starting off safe. No one can get offended by a flavor of potato chip, can they? And these things are dericious. Especially following an evening of drinking and douchebaggery. Wash down that uncomfortable joke with some Salt & Vinegar chips, or forget about those awkward moments after you made a pass at your friend with a little help from these chips. I should be their PR rep.
• Jonathan Lethem - After a long, drag out, nasty little fight, Mr. Lethem walks away as the clear winner as my favorite author (Also, I think the runners up, Tom Robbins & Gabriel Garcia Marquez, are lovers not fighters). No, lil NY scenesters, it's not cuz Fortress of Solitude is so hip and hey I know where Brooklyn is now! It's because his entire body of work is diverse and brilliant. He delves into sci-fi, romance, comedy, drama, detective fiction, and autobiography - occasionally all in the same book. He has taken the reins of American Magical Realism and uses it to stunning effect in Fortress of Solitude, but it is even better rendered in Men & Cartoons, one of his short story collections. He makes a bunch of nerdy references to music, and comic books, and pop culture, and literary cliches, and makes them all work together. If I were to sell people on his work, I would say read Men & Cartoons, then Fortress of Solitude, then Gun with Occasional Music, then The Disappointment Artist, and then I leave the rest to your discretion. The guy's a brilliant, brilliant man and funny as hell. And I hear he's working on a revamp of short lived and incredibly obscure 70s comic Omega the Unknown for Marvel Comics. Pretty sweet for a nerdster from Brooklyn.
• The Flaming Lips - Best band I've ever seen live. Anxiously, and nervously, awaiting their newest album - At War with the Mystics. I've gotten three leaked tracks ("The W.A.N.D., "Mr Ambulance Driver", and a third whose title is unknown), and while they don't share the catchiness and immediacy of Yoshimi's leaked tracks, I can clearly see myself geeking out to them more and more in the future. Can't wait for that new album. And for anyone unfamiliar with the band, I recommend The Fearless Freaks, the documentary detailing the band's rise from ghetto outcasts to Alternative Icons. It's really an interesting documentary, and in one scene when the Lips' musical genius Stephen Drozd is shooting up and detailing how much he hates heroin, it transcends a simple fan letter to a geek's favorite band and becomes a compelling look at a bunch of artists trying to create something new and real. Oh, here's the tracklist for the new album, in case any of y'all haven't seen it or are curious:
  01 The Yeah Yeah Yeah Song
  02 Free Radicals
  03 The Sound of Failure/It's Dark...Is It Always This Dark??
  04 My Cosmic Autumn Rebellion
  05 Vein of Stars
  06 The Wizard Turns On...
  07 It Overtakes Me/The Stars Are So Big, I Am So Small...Do I Stand a Chance?
  08 Mr. Ambulance Driver
  09 Haven't Got a Clue
  10 The W.A.N.D.
  11 Pompeii Am Gotterdammerung
  12 Goin' On
  
• Idiotwork.com - Go here and watch some HILARIOUS clips. I know, it's just simple juxtaposition, but damn if I don't find myself laughing every time. I also happen to love seeing the Green Lantern be a dick to Superman, in TPS. And when Beast Man screams at that Rabbit dude in the He-Man/Gummo smash up, well that's just adorable.
• The Feeling I Get From Listening To and Enjoying Jazz - This is horrible. But when I find some jazz I really like (Miles Davis, In A Silent Way, Sketches of Spain, Birth of Cool, etc. John Coltrane, Blue Train, Lush Life; etc), and can sit there and listen to it, it makes me feel intelligent. It's so weird; but hasn't jazz taken on a scholarly aspect to it these days? I know it started in the speakeasies and poolhalls of the oppressed and the poor, but since then it has become elevated and revered and touted as American's most ingenious invention (outside of those Doggy Steps. Man, that's just awesome - lil steps for your dog. Give these people the Nobel prize, already!). But when I'm listening to a jazz album, and digging on it, then suddenly I feel like "I get it". Maybe that's just me. It's the same sensation I get when I enjoy NPR. Like I'm independently choosing to do something that's respected and thought of as intelligent. Or perhaps I've said too much. Damn you, Sudafed - it's acting like sodium pentathol in my blood!
• The American Version of The Office - The first season (which was only 6 or so episodes) wasn't that good. But since they decided to shed the shadow of the absolutely brilliant UK version, and written their own plot lines and scripts, this show has become brilliant. While I don't think Dwight is as funny or interesting as Gareth, nor Jim/Pam's love angle as compelling as Tim & Dawn's, this show still delivers the goods. Especially with all of the secondary characters, who seem more fleshed out and interesting than their British counterparts. And once again, Steve Carrell proves himself to be a brilliant performer. It would be great to see Carrell's Michael and Ricky Gervais's Brent at some sort of convention together, each trying to top the other or pick up the same girl. Either way, if NBC picked up Arrested Development, renews Scrubs, and put these three with My Name is Earl, you'd have one of the best, funniest, and innovative nights on television. And I know that NBC execs are glued to this blog, so listen - Do it. Get Arrested Development. Renew Scrubs. Make this happen. Cuz I don't think anyone's watching Surface, and you can't keep coming up with Law & Orders to fill the holes in your sinking ship. Come on, NBC!
• You're Losing Me, Lost - Yes, I still watch this show. Yes, I'm addicted and very much interested in the outcome. But Lost is definitely not the same show as it was last season. Last season was all about what Magicians refer to as "the Prestige". It was a shocking revelation. Yes, there was an ongoing mystery of the island and of the other characters, how they were all connected, etc. But mainly you'd watch for this shocking flashback which seemed to compliment the Island story. In the present season, the flashback is there only because that seems to be the necessary form of an episode. And there are no shocking GASP revelations as there were in Season 1 - everything is telegraphed way in advance (Nigerian plane & priests, Shannon's death, the fact that the Others aren't goin to kill Kate, etc). Maybe it's because a handful of writers left the show following the end of season 1 (David Fury and Paul Dini, especially). It's not the same genre bending mindfuck. And more often than not, I find myself thinking the characters are a bunch of retards who have no idea how to communicate with each other for no other reason than for the necessity of the writers. And yet, I keep coming back, hoping to solve the mystery. I love it, I hate it, I love it, I hate it, I love it...etc. Oh, and stop taking so much goddamn time off in between episodes. It kills the momentum and puts a strain on people to remember every detail that the writers cram into an episode and later reference.
• Mr. Goodbar - it's so simple and classic...you just can't fuck with it. Delicious! Treat yourself to one today. Unless you're diabetic. Then use your head and don't listen to disembodied voices on the internet.
• Miller's Crossing - True, the Coen Bros. have fallen a lil short in recent times (Ladykillers was downright boring, but I did really like Intolerable Cruelty). But this movie is still a great film and showcases their genius and originality. And I always find myself quoting it for weeks afterwards. "Don't give me the high hat - I HATE the high hat!" Bravo to the Brothers for coming up with brilliant and original Slang. The film looks amazing, too, as shot by Barry Sonnenfeld, and there are so many great characters and scenes. It's like the dark underbelly of The Big Lebowski. If you haven't seen this movie, please check it out. You'll love it, if only for one character or line.
• Chess & Pool - I'm not good at anything remotely competitive or physical. That extends to pool & chess, neither of which are very physically exerting nor intensely competitive. But in other endeavors, I would grow frustrated and embarrassed by my complete lack of ability. But these two games are so much fun, and so engaging, that I have no problem playing them and sucking out loud. I also enjoy Poker, but I sometimes find myself being rather good at that game. My secret? X-Ray specs. Shhhh...don't tell anyone.

That's about it for now. I'm starting to fade with the 'Fed now. But please discuss and leave some of your thoughts on this page. And thanks to everyone that's been commenting thus far. You guys are the heroes, the legends, the wind beneath my beautiful wings.

Keeps it realz!