Things That Make Me Happy 2: Eddie Lives!

While I know the first Eddie & the Cruisers exists, has anyone actually seen it? All I've ever seen are advertisements and a few scenes from the second one, Eddie & the Cruisers 2: Eddie Lives! I used to think that Eddie & the Cruisers 2 was so postmodern, cuz it was a sequel without an original, and think about that one. And it's not. So that distinction falls squarely on the able shoulders of Leonard, Part 6...and the world is a worse place for it (has anyone besides me and Bill Cosby's immediate family seen Leonard, Part 6? Holy Stromboli! That film reeks of failure for miles around). Anyways, if anyone's seen Eddie & the Cruisers, please let me know...cuz I think it's just a phantom movie; something the die hard fans of Eddie Lives! created to help with their online fan fiction.

Anyways, back to the list!


13) A Literate Mass Transit System

Now I'm new to the fair city of New York, and for the most part I've lived my life in the suburbs or else in an alcoholic coastal, so this constant commute by subway thang is fairly new to me. And while it sucks when the smelly guy decides to rub up against you, or you get accosted by someone spreading the word of Jesus at 8 in the morning, there is one very reassuring aspect about the NYC subways: Everyone is reading. From the free newspapers to comic books to paperback crap to classic entries in the canon, people are reading all the time on the subway. Is this a nerdy thing to be pleased about? Yes. But dammit, it does make my Grinch heart grow ten sizes too big. I think it's just the sight of people actually actively pursuing knowledge or entertainment in the printed word; especially in a time when our culture seems so aggressively illiterate. For christ's sake, we have a president who's PROUD of the fact that he doesn't read newspapers. I also think this may be the difference in the cultural divide in Los Angeles: Angelinos don't really have a mass transit system, instead they drive everywhere (for the most part). Now you just can't read while driving, people. Don't do it, it's stupid and you end up connecting sentences that don't belong together while cutting off four stoned teenagers that have no idea what's going on. "Books On Tape!" I hear you cry, while stuffing your face with those cheetos. While Books on Tape are a semi-literate venture, it doesn't really utilize the same muscles or part of your brain when you are listening to Patrick Ewing reading the latest Oprah Book Club selection. Anyways, keep it up, New York City! I Likes What I Sees.


14) Revisionaries

Go to this Site here: http://ps260.blogspot.com/. Watch some brilliant re-imaginings of trailers for some of your favorite movies. While the West Side Story trailer is well done, my favorite has got to be The Shining. Although I would've loved for them to have incorporated the twin girls, but hey -- they still made a superior product that shows how easy it is to manipulate something for marketing. Kudos on the use of "Solisbury Hill" by Peter Gabriel as well.


15) Seven Swans by Sufjan Stevens

Yes, everyone loves Sufjan Stevens. Yes, he's the Prince Midas of the Indie Music Kingdom. Sure, his concerts are kind of lame and fairly disappointing. And yes, my friend Drew had his fingers on this pulse long before I came into town. These are all true statements. But the fact of the matter is that Sufjan Stevens is pretty damn amazing; he writes musically complex songs with fairly simple lyrics that combine to create true and eerily powerful songs. He makes life, people, beliefs, things seem significant. He shows the Bible thumping Nazis how a Christian should act and sound. He's a romantic and the sense of importance and heartfelt convictions in love and faith use from the speakers when his music plays. Stevens's a brilliant man through and through. His humor, along with his humanism, are put on display in his most (in)famous state albums, with Illinoise definitely being one of his best album. And yet...I've been listening more and more to Seven Swans, the album recorded between Michigan and Illinoise, and I've been loving what I've been listening to. Seven Swans is his most haunting album; it works beautifully as the soundtrack to any journey, and seems to make all of the putrid ordinary aspects of life suddenly glimmer and shine a little. Stevens's work on Seven Swans, when blasting in my headphones along the gray sidewalks of an indifferent city, suddenly adds layers of profundity and pathos; maybe it's his sincere voice as he pleads to people he's loved and lost, or the the simple plucking of a banjo on the opening and closing songs. Maybe it's the combination of love for one another and love of a God, that mixture that inspired so many renaissance men before him. Either way, Seven Swans is a quieter, simpler album that seems to linger like spiritual vapor long after the playing time has run out.


16) The Whitest Kids You Know

You don't know them, but one day you just might. These guys are HIGH-larious. I went to high school with one of them (Sam...who's really good at hiding inside of bags), and now he's in the big city and making people laugh at Caroline's and the UCB Theatre as well as their weekly gig at Pianos Bar. Weird, irreverent, vulgar, semi-offensive, these five guys are pretty great at writing and performing their funny & memorable sketches as well as tight little videos which are pretty brilliant. They are also amazing at creating easily quotable lines from their skits, and the (sorta infamous) "Hitler Rap" isn't just funny, it's also catchy and really good. So please head on over to their site: http://whitestkids.com/. It's full of news on their upcoming shows as well as moichandise and video clips. They may not be perfect yet, but in a year or so, they will be refined, famous, and hilarious; and then you can act all pretentious and say that you knew about them BEFORE that whole Cocaine Bust Went Awry fiasco that happened in Arizona and left untold number of people dead. Bragging Rights!


17) Badminton

I actually haven't played this sport in a looooooooong time. But I love me some badminton. I like that it's actual more physical and requires more endurance than Tennis -- the average championship Badminton match lasts longer and involves more running than the average championship Tennis game. So suck on that, Williams Sisters! Also, I was watching an episode of the BBC comedy Peep Show (which is a pretty good and funny show, but also fairly depressing) and two coworkers retire after a day at the office and play Badminton, and they're in a club where everyone else is playing it too! The british are so weird. No wonder they think men in dresses are hilarious, nevermind that they constantly lose their colonies. Anyways, Badminton is fun cuz you get to say stuff like "Shuttlecock", and also try and aim a plastic dart into the eye of your opponent. Anyone interested in starting up a nationwide Badminton league? We can be like Extreme Dodgeball -- lame, convoluted, and ultimately full of uninteresting and unathletic people. WHO'S WITH ME?!?!?!?!?


18) Political Schadenfreude

For those not hip to the german lingo, Schadenfreude means the joy of someone else's pain. For example, know that time when Uncle Gordo got hit with that sock full of quarters in the nuts and you laughed until you peed yourself? That's Schadenfreude. Say it with me now: sha-den-froi-duh. There you go; I knew that you could. What I mean by Political Schadenfreude is the perverse joy I derive from watching the crash and burn of politicians, ideologies, and/or policies that I disagree with. It's not mature, it's not right, but damn if it don't tickle me all kinds of pink. Now I know that Rove isn't going to get into any real trouble -- that whole administration is like a Rich Good Looking Misogynist: oh they say and do horrible things, but he gets away with it cuz everyone wants to be with him, to be on the winning team. (Sidenote: Libby's fucked though. Sorry, buddy. Your best bet is to turn rat on everyone else, and then hope the Bush Administration doesn't suddenly name you as a threat to freedom) But still, the idea of watching him squirm in front of those lawyers, flop sweat breaking out on that Mole Man face of his while he's silently reassuring himself that he's in control...he's in control...and slowly but surely he begins to unravel until he goes completely crazy like Heather Graham in that scene from Boogie Nights where Roller Girl beats the shit out of that unsuspecting douchebag. And that pleases me. Or when I see Leahy & Specter decry Harriet Meier, trying to sensitively call Bush retarded and Harriet Meier embarassing. That pleases me. Or when I'm watching McCain go all sorts of Deer Hunter flashback on the generals in Iraq is simply awesome, reminding everyone how First Blood began. These signs of my ideological rivals strengthen my resolve and make me smile a sinister smile. I'm not proud of it, but it does feel great when the entire country slowly wakes up from its drunken night of "Freedom" and looks over at the ugly fat chick in our bed that is Bush in the White House. And in just one moment, an eerie chill runs through the collective conscious as everyone suddenly cries "I got to get the fuck outta here!" It's the little, petty things in life that matter.


19) Sausage & Peppers Pizza

This one's just a given. It's delicious and you love it. Also, on a delivery food tangent -- how come I can never order anything from a chinese restaurant besides General Tso's or Sesame Chicken and some fried dumplings? (My roommate also suffers from this affliction) Any time I dare flirt with danger and drift outside the realm of those entrees, I get smacked down by mediocre taste and sometimes a completely revolting revolution on my taste buds. So what's up with dat, i ask you? Fuckin' Chinese.


20) Blade Runner

You know how sometimes you listen to an album or a song over and over again, and that period of your life is kind of defined by that soundtrack. Well, for a while back there (probably June) I was watching Blade Runner a lot. I don't know why. It was on IFC a bunch, and then I own it on DVD, so I just ended up playing it and watching it over and over again. And nothing really gets any better than the Roy Batty/Deckard confrontation in Sebastian's building. "Wake Up--Time to Die!" It's so moody and pessimistic and dark and grimy...it's what good Sci-Fi is, essentially. Not that Sci-Fi has to be dark or grimy, but it has to feel like people really live in that world. The original Star Wars felt lived in, everything covered in dust and kinda shitty but still some shiny & new stuff (mainly the weapons and armor...metaphor? unlikely). Serenity feels like these people live that life on the outer rim with all their chinese cussin'. Hell, even Star Trek 2: The Wrath of Khan really conveyed the impression that Khan lived in a desert shit hole on Seti Alpha 5. Also, how fucking scary is Daryl Hannah in this movie? Granted she's not as fucked up and creepy as when she plays the (too convincing) drugged up stripper in Dancing at the Blue Iguana, but still...that Kabuki makeup at the end always kinds of freaks me out. The idea that this movie serves as an inspiration for Batman Begins shows how disparate the original can be from its descendants (once again, to recap -- BATMAN BEGINS SUCKS HARD).


And the number 21 thing that makes me happy?

21) COMMENTS

So fucking leave some already !!!!!!!!!!!!!

(people who already did are exempted and I kiss the ground you walk on, you magnificient bastards)

So there ya go!

Hit me back, playas.